Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Crappy State of Mind

What an inspired title even.... Its one of those days, I think its that I cant find any time to exercise, I am grumpy and pissed off. Watch out if you speak to me today, I might bite your head off. I feel fat and ugly and zitty and frumpy and mad. I can't seem to get back on track since surgery and my crappy convenience diet, combined with no time to exercise, is making me feel physically and now mentally awful. I feel like I hate the world today, mostly cause I hate myself today. Blah, can I get a big slice of feel sorry for myself pie...

I have a GS meeting at my house tomorrow, the leader is out of town so its all me, with another mom that I actually really like. She is such a great lady, not all wrapped up in all about me like some moms are. I guess I must be feeling judgmental toady too, probably because I judging myself so harshly.

Im actually glad to do the meeting at my house its the prep I abhor.... Im just so overwhelmed but want to do things with my kiddos....

So anyway, my house is a wreck, I have tons of studying to do cause I need to be done by friday now rather than saturday like usual, you see dh's grandfather passed away sunday evening/monday morning (dh's bday btw). I need to exercise, do laundry, wash my face, brush my teeth, shower, I have not time for any of it I have to study. The baby is destroying the house, my life is crazy, it goes on and on. And guess what on the 13th, dh leaves out of town for 6 weeks, maybe able to come home from saturday evening to sunday evening, how much more out of control do you supposed things will get when I have no help? So please, can I get a giant slice of Im helpless out of control pie too,? maybe the lady from the movie Waitress will make one up for me, she made up some great pies didn't she!! Bad baby pie, I got drunk and Earl got me pregnant pie, I loved those pies!!! Wish she'd make me a few.....

I know I signed up for all this, told myself I could handle it all, but news flash, guess what, I CANT!!

3 comments:

~teachmom~ said...

Cyndee,
I am sorry you are having one of those days. I understand a teeny tiny bit where you are coming from...mostly the fact that when it comes to us putting ourselves down, we shoot it right back at others. Ya know me and my big mouth! ;)I've eaten a lot of the judgement pie, and it tastes pretty bitter. Blech.
HUGS to you. Hope your week ends up getting better. I know it will be hard for you these coming weeks. Don't hesitate to come on and vent when you can....it's good therapy!

HUGS!

Anonymous said...

Sending you big ol hugs!!! I feel like that every now and then, too... ;)

NeaCakes said...

awww hugs! We all have those days, for reals.

And I'm sorry about B's grandpa. :(